The sun's still a shining

Getting into the habit of blogging regularly takes some commitment. Maybe with my shiny new iPad it'll get easier. So, the tropical holiday season has begun! I'm probably more excited about Christmas this year than I've ever been! First, it's the first Christmas I'll get to spend with my mother in over a decade! Second, my husband and I have been so incredibly blessed this year, I can't wait to share the love! The weather .is absolutely beautiful! It's been consistently in the low 80's and sunny! I don't think I could ask for better weather! Sadly. I hear it's snowing in my hometown of st Louis...boo for them, unless they like it...they can have it!

So here we are, Boris and I, sitting out on the lanai, sipping some crystal light, and enjoying God's blessing! I must admit, at the risk of sounding like I'm bragging...it's good to be me right now.

Our first Florida Halloween!

I am so excited about Halloween! I really hope we get loads of trick or treaters! I bought 9 bags of candy. I live in a small gated community and we have a few kids in the neighborhood, so HOPEFULLY we get a few! It's supposed to be a beautiful 75 degrees. We had hoped to go to Orlando for Halloween, but I was needed at my job, so I had to change my plans. But it's ok. Halloween is a kick off to the wonders of Fall.....mostly Thanksgiving. I LOVE Thanksgiving! I love the baking! I love it when people enjoy my pastries, and the look on their faces when they have a joy-gasm from my pies! Gah I love the Holidays!!!

Freaking wrinklies!

I have decided, that most of the old people in Florida have an unjustified sense of self importance. I hope I never become like that. I'm sure I'll be exactly like "Weezer" from Steel Magnolias. An angry, cynical old bitty. Truthfully, the thought of that should horrify most people, however, I find it's something to look forward to. I'm so tired of these old assholes walking around like they're the world's greatest generation...and it's called that because of them personally. Eff that! They walk at a snails pace, and leave their shopping carts dead center of the aisle....at a angle, then walk away. They stop short and block doorways to overlook the receipt at stores...not leaving out the exit...no, they're leaving out the entrance! But I get the dirty looks when I tell them to move the hell out of they way. Being old doesn't give you license to drive 10 miles an hour in a 45 zone. They come into my work, and mumble at me their order...then get pissy when I didn't hear them properly. Not to mention the mess they make on the tables....I've seen toddlers eat cleaner. Sugar packets and napkins EVERYWHERE! This is why I'd rather bake...leave me alone in the kitchen and let me do my thing. However, the career I've chosen for myself requires me to smile, and pretend these assholes are important to me, that I give a damn about their great grandkids...or that I care about the pie crust they used to make that won a pie contest in east Jesus Ohio. Or that I should make donuts.....I will NEVER make a damn donut again....don't even ask. (sigh....vent complete)  In short...I hope when it's my turn to be the world's greatest generation, I am hopefully going to remember all the things that piss me off, and not be that person.

Wishing for Fall

So...it's mid October, and yes it's still in the mid 80's.....I'm so desperate for fall weather, I've reduced myself to purchasing fake fall leaves. I long for fall. It's my favorite season, and now I'll never see it....unless I go visit it. I do adore living in Florida, and I look forward to no snow....but alas, I miss Autumn. I guess I'll appease my needs by baking fall goodies. I pulled out the crock pot and it's gonna be a pot roast and chili week. I'll turn the air conditioner down low...and pretend.

Not so Extreme Couponing

There was a time in my life when I had nothing. My husband and I had both lost our jobs and was forced to live off of credit cards. That only gets you so far when you don't even have enough money to pay the bill. This is something I wouldn't wish on anyone. It has taken literally years to bounce back from that. And truthfully, we're still coming back from it. Finally, after a lot of prayer, and trusting God, Tim and I are on our feet. It has been a long road. At the worst, we had to take cold showers because we couldn't pay the gas bill, and I sold cakes to buy groceries. But I tell you this my friend, don't feel sorry for me, God has never left me without what I needed. Through all of this we have a new outlook on life. Also a new look on what is important. When Tim and I moved to Florida, we decided this would be a new life. Start over and hand in hand embark on this adventure. The story on how we got here was a blog post in itself. One thing I promised myself when we came here was never again would I allow myself to get into that situation. Never again would we be broke anxiously awaiting the next paycheck. It's really no way to live and all I really want is security. One day I decided to check out the extreme couponing show in TLC. It was like lightening striking! I can do that! I don't want to live in a grocery store, and I don't have a need for 10,000 tubes of toothpaste, but I can scale that down to my specific needs. So, I started doing research. Most of the ladies on that show go through hundreds of sunday news inserts a week...Well, lets scale that down for my family, I buy 3, sometimes 4. My first trip to the store was so much fun. I bought enough cleaning product to last 6 months for around $20. Now, I have a closet dedicated to my stockpile, and I don't have to buy my husband razors for a year, and I have enough shampoo to last just as long. Never again will I not be able to afford shampoo. My family and I will have security. My husband has a good job, and I get to make cake for fun, not survival. And I will continue to coupon in my scaled to realistic fashion. I praise God for getting me through that time, and I won't ever take his blessings for granted. If any of you think that couponing is ridiculous, you've never been poor enough to try anything. You've never really been without. Having that little stockpile is so comforting. And the best part, anyone can do it. The Key? Stay organized. It took about a $15 dollar investment to get started and $3 a week for newspapers. I only buy the stuff that I use and need. Shampoo/Conditioner, toothpaste and tooth brushes (I keep it to a year supply), dog treats, cleaning products...any extra, I will gladly donate to homeless shelters. Food stuff is about the same. Keep it to a year supply, and donate extra. Pay it forward.

Never thought I'd have to explain that to an adult

As I've told you, I work on an island at a bakery, cafe, and coastal store. Yesterday, I was working in the store part, when two English women came up to me holding a sand dollar painted with palm trees....one of many kitchy florida crappy things we sell.
"Excuse me, what is this?" they asked
."That's a magnet" I replied
"No, I mean we saw these on the beach, they weren't painted, but they had this pretty star carving on it"
So now I was amused. Were these ladies really asking me what a sand dollar was? oh jeeze.
"Yes, that's a sand dollar...were the ones you saw on the beach White? or Brown? The white ones are dead, you can take all you want. The brown ones are still alive, so you have to leave them." I explained.
"No, these were carved, with a star symbol, and they had little slots in them...somebody carved a design in them. Who carves them and puts them back in the water?" they asked
"Um....God?"

I further explained to them that sand dollars were naturally like that, that there was nobody carving them. Oh lord. On a brighter note..they were so excited about these, that they bought a couple of our overpriced glitter sand dollars for 15 bucks a pop.
I really just wanted to go into the kitchen and bake.

Jersey Shore member need not apply

I'm both amused and annoyed by some men. I've never been popular, or pretty per-Se. I have a husband who adores me, and I'm lucky to have him. However, there are some men out there who really think they're doing me a favor by flirting with me. That's laughable. Not to mention uncomfortable. I notice it more since I lost the weight. Mostly it's men who look like they just got off the bus from the Jersey Shore. Are they trying to give fatty a thrill? Jeeze. Growing up I never got much attention from boys..and I was actually ok with that. I had a ton of guy friends, and I was fine with that too. Maybe that's why I now spend so much time in the burlesque circuit...because I have the maturity level of most teenage men. But I digress...please...Joey D....Stop hitting on me..I'm not interested. I love my husband, and unless you're Chris Evans...or Johnny Depp...or Robert Downey Jr....I'm not looking to broaden my horizons...nor will I give you free shit. FYI if you are any of THOSE men listed...I got permission from Tim :)

It can't always be sunshine and sausage.

Yesterday Tim and I went to the beach, it was beautiful, windy, but beautiful. On a typical day the waves are fairly calm and the water is mostly clear....not yesterday. I think it was because of the tropical storm out in the gulf. These waves were huge (to us). Definitely surfable, but we got in anyway. It was all we could do to be able to stand up and recover after diving into the wave.  It was a lot of fun, however today I'm exhausted from my ass beating.

From what I hear, fall has made her appearance back home in Mo. It's bittersweet for me, because fall is my favorite season. While it's 70 degrees there, it's still in the upper 80's and low 90's. I'm told that it will remain hot till October. There's pros to that too...like swimming until Halloween, and going to the beach. It's definitely an adjustment. But since we chose to move to Florida, I guess I'll quit whining about it. I can't really complain that I'll never have to deal with snow and ice again. I can't complain that "cold weather" means 50-60 degrees. In retrospect, I don't have much to complain about.

The Atomic Boutique.com | Rockabilly Clothing | Prom Dress | Handbags | Hosiery | Shoes | and more

The Atomic Boutique.com | Rockabilly Clothing | Prom Dress | Handbags | Hosiery | Shoes | and more

Some random Spiderman comic.

My Uncle, who has more money than God, is having a birthday. So my grandma has my mother call me....)because heaven forbid she call me) to tell me to go buy him a spider-man comic book....Okay. Which one? What series does he read? Going out to the store and purchasing Amazing Spider-man #234 isn't going to do a thing. Is he ever reading that series? has he read the previous 233 comics? Hell if I know. Does it make me a nerd to know that going to the store and purchasing one single spider-man comic is equivalent to knowing he likes the show How I met your Mother, and buying him season 5 episode 4. I think I'll go with a spider-man graphic novel instead...at least then he'd get a full story...furthermore,when the hell does he read them? Them man is a Dr, and president of his partnership. He works constantly.  But I digress....now I have to go buy my uncle a flipping comic book, that he probably won't read. Jeeze.

Dazzeling sequins and sideshow freaks!

I'm itching to get back on stage...I'm dying to preform again. I've been working on some new showstopping things for the Baroness to do. I just bought a ton of black lace and sequins. I've been working on her new act for a while now, I think in January, she will rise again. Yes! It's time to polish those stilettos, and paint on the eye make-up. I finally found a Burlesque group looking for a singer...apparently they're rare down here...lucky me! I'm really wanting to bring some neo-vaudville stuff to Florida. I've developed such a love for the beauty of that era...oh why couldn't I have been born then?

Jimmy got the shaft again!

As an economic decision, Tim and I have one car. It's not that we can't afford a second, but if we seem to survive with one, why have the extra expense for a second. I take the bus to the island, and there's a free trolly that runs the length of Anna Maria. Easy peasy. It might take me a little longer to get to work, but I enjoy the time with my kindle, and the ability to wake up a bit before starting the day. Riding the bus is different here than it was in St Louis, there, you must be strapped and be prepared for a good ol fashioned raping. Here, little old ladies drive the bus. While I do see an occasional cast of colorful characters, mostly they're harmless. Last week there was this "homeless" looking man, and a couple of guys who looked like they stepped right off the Jersey Shore tour bus having a discussion about guitar players. Homeless man declares that "That nigger Billy Hendrix was an OK guitar player" ok headphones off, this is gonna be good. I kept my head down to hide my giddiness of such an inappropriate declaration. Vinnie and Paulie didnt seem fazed either, they simply stated that ol Billy H was so good because he had 12 inch long fingers....but if you want REAL guitar playing we should check out the guy from slipknot. Racist, stupid, homeless....yeah that guy is going places. And as for Vinnie and Pauly....I fear for the future of our country.

Working on a Island

For those of you who do not know, I work on Anna Maria Island, Florida. It's an absolutely stunning area with an old Florida charm. Every day I see tons of people, mostly from other countries. Apparently if you want to get an "America Experience" you vacation on Anna Maria. While I'm completely aware I work a job in which I'm mostly overqualified for, the enjoyment of working within eye-shot of the beach is worth the smaller pay scale. Besides, sometimes it's not about having tons of cash, it's about living a fulfilled life. But I digress....Europeans...Holy moley, Europeans are crazy. Maybe one day I will be blessed enough to afford a trip to another country, and when I do, I will learn what not to do from the Europeans. First: Learn the friggin language. I'm not saying you must be fluent...but damn. At least learn enough to order food, and go shopping, and find the bathroom. Second: Don't expect me to think you're special because you're from another country...would you treat me special? Nope. Furthermore, I see foreigners all day, you my friend, are not that special. Third: Maybe this goes along with number one, but also learn the currency. If I were less honest, I could clean you out, Mr. I don't know the difference between a $20 and a $50...yeah that happened. Alas, I am honest, and I do want you to enjoy your vacation, so I won't rip you off....but I can't speak for all the island's employees...just sayin....

It is kind of my dream job though....working near the beach, baking delicious sweets and drinking lattes all day. I guess I'll keep it. And they usually are pretty generous with the tip jar, so I suppose I keep smiling and making jokes, and you keep eating my food and putting bread in my jar.

Ok, here we go!

So, I have adventures, and I love to tell stories....sometimes people like to hear them. Now, I can't promise that they'll always be appropriate, my language may not always be clean, my attitude may not always be pleasant....but I will try. If you're still with me, let's do this.